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2nd to LAST EPISODE
"2nd to LAST EPISODE" is the 149th episode in the Skyrim for Pimps series and the 18th episode of Season 7. This episode is a "very special kind of walkthrough" for the quests "Returning the Favor" and the "Heart of the Gods," and the completion of the Falskaar (mod) Questline. Plot Fün Tits complains to Emre that she needs to go to the bathroom being in stasis for weeks being told a endless story. Emre asks Fün to be a little bit more patient and that the story would end soon. "If this were a show, this would be the second to last episode." Back in Emre's endless story telling, Jarl Agnar tells Mai Dik that Yngvarr is heading to the heart chamber. "We'll just take the ventricle there." Mai Dik mounts a horse and takes off while the other head to the heart chamber by foot. They were all getting excited on figuring out what to do once they get their hands on the heart of the gods. Mai Dik thinks that she'll just press a button that says "spread the love" but Emre explains to her the function of the heart of the gods is to create and destroy life. Distraught, Mai Dik has second thoughts and she thinks maybe it was just better to seal this away forever if it does have that button that spreads love, while Emre tries his best to convince Mai Dik to continue to pursue it. After falling off her horse and killing it, the Jarl and his men start attacking her. "Betrayed!" she thought; she couldn't understand why she was being attacked by her friends. Keeping a distance from her so-called friends, she sees them stop. She herself stops, turns around, and walks slowly as if they were in a western getting ready for a duel. Unfortunately, her playfulness doesn't convince them to make up and she runs away for fear of getting killed. She safely makes it to Mountain Mist Temple where the heart chamber is located. Her Jarl friends were still mad at her so she hurries to the heart chamber where Yngvarr and his crew were waiting for them. Finally reaching a cut-scene, the Jarl and his men stop coming after her, although their gaze still laser-focused on her. After Brother Thorlough's late arrival and Mai Dik's comment that he's late as usual, Yngvarr starts his spiel about his wizards dismantling the magic barrier protecting the heart of the gods and how the heart of the gods is rightfully his and he felt extremely frustrated that that item was displayed right in front of him, never to be in his possession. Mai Dik could not relate at all because his relationship with her Khajiit boyfriend was going super and it would be the worst feeling in the world if somebody that close to her were to never reciprocate those feeling to her. The wizards disable the barrier and Yngvarr heads for his reward, the heart of the gods. To stall for time, Jarl Agnar challenges Yngvarr to a duel (although still angrily looking right at Mai Dik). Yngvarr, instead, requests Mai Dik to fight him. They fight, she almost loses but the beef ration, and possibly the Riekling friend that she summoned saves her. Yngvarr is almost defeated but he paralyzes everyone and he runs to get the heart of the gods. Suddenly, a random dragon teleports out of nowhere taking Yngvarr's life and bringing the story to an anticlimactic end. Back in present time, Crotch and Fün seemed to be engaged in Emre's story. Emre, really astonished, points out how finally he was able to get them interested in his story now that they were getting close to the end. Crotch: "We're just trying to get the rest of the story out of you so it's done and you can kill us and we can be done." Fün: "Not really interested but that's cool. Way to think we were. That's awesome." However, Emre, Fün Tits and Crotch Guzzler all agreed that it was a stupid ending and what was more stupid to them was that Mai Dik sealed the heart away so no one else can ever get it. "Mai Dik f*cked everyone over!" Crotch calls Mai Dik short sighted and Fün imagines the fun she could have had with Freya with that kind of artifact. Crotch then rages at Emre for telling this useless story that led to nowhere. "So what you're saying is, the whole time you were in Mai Dik, you were just wasting you time, it was completely useless, just like the entire fucking story that you've been telling us for what seems like years." So, Emre admits to Crotch that this whole story was pointless and that there's one more thing he has to do before killing both Fün, Crotch, and the universe, and that it would only take one more episode. Crotch is relived because he believes that "nobody watches this anymore." Fün argues that the "whole thing should have wrapped up three years ago" when S'oggy died. Crotch faces Fün and says that the story should have wrapped up when he committed suicide. Fün argues that it maybe should have ended with Astrid in the cave. Emre chimes in and says that if it ended there, it would have omitted the fight in Library Land. They continue on discussing whether there can be a good ending to this series. While they discussed, the camera zooms out to show Mai Dik alongside S'oggyballs' lifeless body and the heart of the gods on a table. Video See also * Season 7 * Mai Dik Reference Category:Season 7 Category:Episodes